I have always had an active dream life. As a child, I remember having vivid and recurring dreams. I have dreamt entire novels that I might or might not have a role in. I have dreamt full length films like I was sitting in a theater just watching a movie on a screen. I have dreamt jokes so funny that I have woken myself up laughing. I have experienced lucid dreams where I am able to direct my actions or the actions of others. I have also had dreams so unspeakably upsetting that I will wake myself up to escape them. But, by far the most curious dream experiences I have had are dreaming of those who have passed from this life. The first “visitation” dream of someone who had passed was with my neighbor from childhood. His daughter was my best friend and we spent many of our young hours in their home and at his business. He was a diabetic and in her childhood language she referred to him having “sugar bean-ditis”. Anyway, Waylon, was a double above-the-knee amputee and he had mobility issues while his wife cared for him full-time the last few years. When the eventual time came, my now-adult friend called me and asked me to go be with her Mom and Dad at our local hospital until she and her sister could come in from the Metroplex. I did. It is one of only 2 times in my life I have stayed up all night. I remember singing to him softly and just standing at his bedside that night. I’m fairly certain there were only very short periods when his wife wasn’t present but, somehow, it’s that alone time that my memory recalls. My friend and her sister arrived at the hospital at 5am and I was relieved of my duties in time to get ready for work the next day – that day, as it was. It was his time to be released from his human form and he passed on soon after. We had the funeral and my dear friend asked me to do a “reading” at Waylon’s service, which is common in the Catholic faith. It was sometime after that when Waylon came to me in a dream. I remember he had a long black car – something like a limousine – and he drove me around the neighborhood so happy to be independent and able to navigate this fine vehicle. It’s just a flash of a memory but it *felt* significant upon waking and to this day, I recall it while thousands of other “regular” dreams have faded away.
Another dream visit involved my maternal grandmother. She was a lovely woman but, due to certain family issues, we weren’t close. After she passed, she came to me and took me on a tour of her most prized possessions. Everything was displayed in beautiful lit boxes like you would see in a museum with just a single thing showcased in each. It was a glimpse of her and her treasures and it gave me complete compassion for who she was and how we had somehow misunderstood her. That’s the common theme of my death dream visits. They bring me great compassion for the deceased. And, they bring me closer to a pure love for them. I do not know if it is some sort of brain trick that manifests as a dream for me and I really do not care if it is. The PEACE it leaves in it’s wake is worth it, even if my spirit is somehow creating it. My two most significant dream visits occurred with my sister and my dad. My sister was only 41 when she died after a 2 year battle with inflammatory breast cancer. She left behind a 17 year old daughter and an 11 year old son, a new husband, numerous friends, our parents and me. Her suffering was nothing short of awful. She fought death with every ounce of energy her body could muster. She had many unsettled issues and there was a lot of pain for those close to my sister. And she had pain. Terrific pain. Pain I would not wish on anybody. But, then she died and her pain ended and ours did not. We suffered for her suffering and all those unresolved feelings we still had to manage. About 6 weeks after she died, Kim came to me in the most vivid visit-dream I have ever had. She has appeared in dreams several times, but, usually just a wave or often a hug (right before waking) when I have been struggling. This BIG visit was during a nap. It was a long visit and nothing short of incredible. We were communicating without words – as in all of my “visits”. Just exchanging energic thoughts in complete clarity without the cumbersome-ness of language. I was able to ask questions about anything and everything and she answered them all. She showed me how the Universe worked. In her version, it was like every tiny thing, even the smallest flutter of a butterfly’s wing caused an almost imperceptible breeze that moved a single blade of grass that then eventually resulted in a wave of growing energy that created the weather, tidal flow and EVERYTHING on the planet. Every single action was pre-determined and HAD to happen in just that way to create the life we are intended to have. This extended out to every thought and choice that WE have as humans creating the “us” that makes our personalities, families, communities and societies. She portrayed it to me as a giant Universal “clock” wherein the smallest part made a “tic” and that built up to a larger cog, then to a wheel and finally, eventually to gears that all turned “behind the scenes” of what is our Reality. My sister’s explanation of my life, our lives and life on this planet gave me this sense of peace that everything, literally EVERY THING, that we experience and every emotion and all of it MUST be so in order for the Universe to function as it is intended. Not that there aren’t bad decisions and bad actions and even bad people, but that they are all NECESSARY for our soul’s journey. This peace, especially after her disease process and all the questions of why, why, why was healing. There wasn’t anything she or we or anyone could have done to have changed the outcome. It HAD to be. In this dream visit, she was in her most perfect human form – radiant of body, long-flowing curls and pure Sister-love but still and all completely HER. I remember waking with tears and taking a long time to process what she had shown me. I was unable to talk about it to anyone for a couple of weeks. When I was finally able to put a word frame around my experience, I shared it with my husband. It brought me as much emotion to attempt to tell him about it as it did when she shared it with me. Now, years later, I know she bestowed upon me an incredible gift of understanding. The peace that came with this knowledge has stayed with me to this day.

My Dad waited a bit for his visits. The first time he came to my dream world was about 6 months after his unexpected passing. We were on vacation with friends in New Orleans and in my dream he just stepped out into my view and gave me a wave to let me know he was OK. He wasn’t close, it seemed he was about a block away, but it was powerful. The next day as we left for the airport, I looked down and saw a dime. In the space of the trip to the airport and the journey home, I found 5 or 6 dimes. I understood that this was his way of expressing to me that he was present. I continue to find dimes now. He usually sends them when I’m on an adventure or a run (especially a 5k) and it brings me great joy to find those dimes. I have found them in foreign countries (that have other currencies!) and in places where plenty of people could have found them before I did. This past weekend, as my friend and I walked in the local park, a dime shined right in my path. I said “Hey, Dad!” out loud and she shared the beauty of the moment with me as we acknowledged him saying “hi”. I have a collection of these dimes and it always astounds me how it’s not pennies, quarters or nickels… just dimes. Anyway, Dad came to me in another “how the Universe works” dream. He expressed the afterlife to me as complete and encompassing love with no judgement. He showed me eternal wavelengths of colored light woven into a Universal tapestry. The lights had no beginning and no ending but at points where they intersected – the pattern created expressed our relationships with others. Some touched briefly and some were interwoven as far as I could see. It was just beautiful and perfect. I have had other encounters with Dad but none so significant as this.

My most recent dream visit was with Lyla. Lyla is the granddaughter of a dear friend. She was diagnosed with a rare genetic cancer at 18 months. She was in treatment for half of her short 3 years on this Earth. Lyla visited me in the early morning hours of Mother’s Day this year. She had come to play and give me the sweetest, most pure hugs I’ve ever had. She was radiant and full of joy and laughter. We were at her grandmother’s house and she told me her tummy didn’t hurt anymore. In her life, Lyla had large abdominal tumors that were terribly painful. I told her how sorry I was that she hadn’t been able to take her Make-a-Wish trip to Disney. She said “that’s OK. What I really enjoyed was time here with my family.” As we played we found a bunny in a mound and she said “We don’t touch it, just watch.” So we didn’t touch the bunny. We could smell bacon cooking in the house that her Daido (grandpa) was making. We played and she asked me if she could come another time for a play date. “Of course! I would love that!”, I responded. And, then I woke up. It was the first time I had met Lyla. I had been close with her grandmom for years but Lyla & I hadn’t connected until that dream. I wanted to tell her grandmother in person but, since it was Mother’s Day and I wanted to share it with her then, I texted her my account of the dream. Just last evening, now a month since that dream, I had the chance to visit with my friend for her birthday. She walked us out as we were leaving and told us about Lyla playing near the swingset. That often a bunny would come up and get quite close to her. If anyone else approached, the bunny would run, but, if it was just Lyla, she would stay. Lyla never touched it.